After entering into a more serious relationship, I’ve been realizing how much even my last year and a half of learning business has played into even the way I pursue relationships.
I’ve never been in a dating relationship before. Some may find that odd. Odd that I’ve never at least been in some sort of a relationship, even if it were short-lived. But God, for whatever reason, has kept me from any relationships until now. Something I’m so thankful for now.
Because I’ve never been in a relationship before, I’ve felt completely blind going into it. I’ve gone as far as asking “how do you date?” It probably sounds dumb, maybe something that most take for granted, but I had to admit to myself that I didn’t know how it worked.
Of course, everyone dates and pursues relationships in a different way, and I certainly wouldn’t want to pursue mine in the same way as many others. However, I’ve been so grateful and blessed to be able to seek counsel from many people who have gone before me. There’s a verse that I believe in whole-heartedly:
“Without counsel plans fail, but with many advisers they succeed.” – Proverbs 15:22
It doesn’t say that you should listen to every person that ever gives you advice, simply that you should have many advisors. By having an abundance of counselors, you are able to take advice from each and as Paul Teasdale says, chew up the meat, spit out the bones.
Almost everyone has some good advice that they can give you, it’s just surrounded by lots of bad advice at times. Not that you need to seek counsel from these people, but if you have enough good advisors, you are able to seek wisdom from each and put the pieces together from each as to what might actually be wisest in your situation.
It seems many try to get through things with a “make mistakes and learn” attitude. Which by golly is a sure-fire way to learn what not to do, but if at all possible, I would love to try and avoid that as much as possible, especially by seeking wisdom from Godly people who have gone before me. There’s no reason that my girlfriend and I should be going into this blind when we have such an abundance of counselors around us.
I of course know that this doesn’t mean we’ll never make mistakes in our relationship. That we’ll always communicate perfectly, and that we’ll always honor and respect each other. Taking advice doesn’t mean that you won’t make mistakes, but with much prayer, counsel, and wisdom, perhaps we can try and learn some before we make the mistakes of doing them.
Some people might feel weird about talking to others and asking them about how to date or how to do relationships. Maybe it’s a little embarrassing, but I think because of the last year and a half of being willing to ask questions and wanting to learn about so many things in the business world, I’m not only okay with asking questions, I’m excited to learn and grow from the answers that I receive. So many people have so many stories and ideas for how their relationship went well or fell short and being able to learn from them and hear them think back on their time where I’m at is a real gift.