“You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.”
I’ve been listening to/reading Dale Carnegie’s book “How to win friends and influence people.” Such an incredible book that I’m annoyed I haven’t read before.
The quote above is just one of the many fantastic quotes in the book.
It might seem weird to people to read a book about “winning” friends. Like maybe it’s somehow taking advantage of people. That’s why I love this quote. The book doesn’t talk about how to trick people into liking them, but instead encourages the reader to understand others to a greater degree.
The better you understand the way humans process things, the more you’ll be able to cater to that and connect with others better.
Every single person is focused on themselves. Sure, to different levels of focus, but everyone has that focus.
Think about it. If you’re handed a photo with 20 people in it, including yourself, who’s the first person you look for? Even if you have a crush on someone or really like someone else in the picture, you almost always look for yourself first.
We are so “me” focused. When we can realize that everyone else is as well, we can start to understand how to best converse with others and figure out how to best create strong relationships with them.
Everyone thinks of themselves. If you want to be friends with them, talk about what’s most important to them: them.