There are some things that we bottle up for long periods of time. Sometimes it’s because we’re waiting for the right time, sometimes we’re waiting for the right stage in a relationship, sometimes it’s just feelings we don’t feel we can fully express or that it will be taken the wrong way.
These can all be legitimate concerns. Sometimes it really isn’t the right time to bring certain conversation topics up. But what I’ve realized is that it’s often before we feel comfortable that it’s the right time.
Having what I call “real” conversations is when both parties involved are being vulnerable about aspects of their life that puts them at risk. Risk as in they don’t know how it may be received. There are people out there who will judge you because of what you tell them, but I’ve found people are much more comfortable hearing these real things than we think they will be. And often, when we’re real, others are real.
These are the conversation that I love. Talking about important things. Things that challenge us to be better people. Challenge us to pursue God in a more healthy way. I’ll admit though, sometimes it’s truly not the right time for these conversations. There’s sometimes when I’m talking to someone and it just feels uncomfortable and unrewarding to get into these. We’re not at that level yet.
Other times, it’s literally my first time meeting them ad we get into it.
The most rewarding conversations I’ve found though are with those that you have probably known for at least a decent amount of time and then you hit a new level of conversation. You go past a layer that maybe you didn’t even think was a boundary, but now that you’re past it there’s more freedom in the friendship.
I encourage you to start these conversations with those you’ve known for a while. Open up the lid on a deeper issue that might be uncomfortable. I think you’ll be amazed at the growth there is in the friendship from this.