Adaptation And The Master’s Mission (Part 3: The First Month)

This post is part 3 of a series on my adventure going to a year-long training program in the remote mountains of North Carolina. To start at the beginning, check out the first post in the series here: Adaptation And The Master’s Mission (Part 1: Initiation)

Previous parts: Part 2: First Impressions

 

The First Month

So, I made my first impressions. What were the next steps to getting connected in this new place? I am highly extroverted, so I knew that it was important for me to make connections right away. How would I go about doing this?

When you go to a new place or join a new group, it’s important to be two things: Be yourself, and be what others want you to be.

“Wait, how can you do both?” You might ask. “And why aren’t you telling me to just be myself?” That’s the popular message these days, right?

Here’s what I mean: I believe it’s always important to stick to who you are. If you change your personality just to fit into a new group of people, you usually don’t fool anyone, and even if you do, the kind of relationships you form by being fake are stressful, hollow, and incredibly hard to maintain.

However, nobody has only one aspect to their personality. It’s important to listen when you enter new groups. What do they like to talk about, what do people laugh at, what things make people uncomfortable, etc. By paying attention to these things, you can use your personality to better meld into different groups.

For instance, when I was in high school, I was into a lot of different things. I played sports, I performed a lot of music, I was heavily involved in the homeschool community, I worked at a waterpark, I did theater, etc. I had many different interests and I enjoyed each of them. What I had to realize though, was that most of my friends who live and breath musicals, couldn’t care less about the sports and tournaments I was going to. My friends who worked at the waterpark weren’t interested in what was happening within the homeschool community.

That didn’t mean that I couldn’t be myself, it simply meant that when I was around my orchestra buddies, they’ll be more interested in conversation if I talk about my love for the Moonlight Sonata, rather than my obsession with Ultimate Frisbee. I loved both, but not every group of people is going to share the same interests as you

This all probably seems like common sense, but the amount of people I have seen go on and on about their favorite sports team in a group that never watches sports is painfully awkward.

Be yourself, yes. But be the part of yourself that finds similarities with others, not the part that finds differences.

Even among the candidate’s, there were many different personalities I learned to connect with. From a Rwandan family who spoke very little English to a former professional boxer.

Apart from adapting to people and personalities, I also was thrown into a work and learning environment I knew almost nothing about. This was training for remote missions. I grew up a city boy. When things went wrong in our house, we called somebody to come fix it. That’s part of the reason why I was here. I was ready to learn and grow. I knew I would have a lot to learn, and that I would probably look stupid most of the time because of that. But I had to set that aside. I had to go in humble, ready to learn everything that I could, and never afraid to ask questions to fully understand and solve the problems set before me.

The days were set up with a healthy mix of classroom work and actual field work. So if we were studying dams in class, we would be out building a dam in the afternoon. We had some dirty jobs, but I loved it. The amount that I was learning far out-weighed any pain that came from the work.

People sometimes try to prove how much they know when going into a new job, and while it’s important to demonstrate that you’re capable, it’s equally important to come in with a humble approach, ready to listen and learn all that you can from people who are trying to teach you.

Because I was listening to others and looking for ways to create value, by the end of the first month, I was leading worship at church on Sunday’s and Wednesday’s, leading music a couple mornings a week for devotions, and I was getting people together one night a week to play sports.

Once again, these things were vital, not only to my success at TMM, but also in creating an environment that I was content and comfortable in. I feel best when I am being productive, stretched in my work, constantly learning, and creating value for others and in the first month, I had set myself up perfectly to do this.

Check out Part 4: Finishing Strong to hear the next part of the story.